14/3

Hmm... there are 2 topics I wanna talk about today. But before that, let me handle some of my personal stuff. Not gonna brag about what I did today but...

Yesterday I was chatting with my friend(using 'mary' to replace her real name) on msn. It was regarding my ex-girlfriend. I can't say out her name because I know her friends love to read my blog. Forgive me for that... well.. all I wanna say is that... yesterday night.. I can't sleep at all. I don't know what's wrong.. I tried to close my eyes...but I just can't sleep... my mind was thinking... thinking of the word 'fairness'. Mary... you know..maybe you were right... you were right that it is wrong of me to stay away from my ex-gf after I found out the truth about her.. but I am sorry.. it is my phobia. You said I wasn't fair... she is a human too... she eat and sleep like me too. I agree... I wasn't fair. BUT.... if I was fair to her... who is gonna be fair to me?
When we were together, she lied to me that she wasn't a **. I don't mind the fact that she lied to me because I understand that humans do lie... I tell lies too.. who doesn't?
But mary.. the fact that ** became her history to me... I lost my conscience by staying away from her.
It's all over. So why am I writing this paragraph on my blog now? Mary... you are her close friend... and I am your friend... if you seriously still think that I don't have the right to comment on her being a **... if you think that I should apologize for insulting her... then fine.
Different people have different views on **. You think it's alright... but I think it's not alright.
I don't wanna apologize to her personally... because I believe that I will make it worse if I do that. Take it as I have no balls..take it as I have no courage.. I am just a coward. BUT LOOK....... the fact that I seriously loved her once... it pains me.
Mary... ask your guy friend this question. After dating a girl for 1 month, how will he feel if his gf says that she still doesn't take him as her bf yet? It's not insulting... it's humiliating.
Anyway, I promise you that I will never talk about her again... I do treat her as a friend still. I am sorry.

Phew... after saying out what I wanna say.. I can finally sleep comfortably tonight.
The first topic that I wanna say today is 'interesting'.
You must be wondering. Interesting? How special can this word be?
Well... do you know that 90% of the things that we do are based on interest?
Lets talk about language. Singaporeans love to watch korean drama nowadays. We perceive it as exciting. That's why we love to watch it. So one day, you feel like learning korean language. The reason is very simple. You wanna learn korean language because you BELIEVE that korean language is interesting. But is this true to Korean citizens? Nope.. this is not true...The korean thinks that their language is not interesting at all. Have you wondered why?

BINGO! That's right! What I am trying to say is that you believe that korean language is interesting because you don't understand it at all. However, due to the fact that koreans understand their language too well, it's no longer interesting to them.

Do you get what am I trying to say? Let me give you a better real life example. A boy who wanna date a girl. It's perfectly normal right? But why do this boy wanna date this particular girl? Why not anyone else? Again, the answer is very simple.When this boy sees this girl, he believe that this girl is very interesting. He wants to know more about her. Because she is interesting and this boy don't really understand her character yet, he wants to date her.
After so much effort put in, this girl accepted him. They start to understand each other.
So it goes like hmm.. my gf doesn't like crab... my gf hates red. After understanding each other, they decided to get married. After marriage, because they understand each other so well, they start to get bored of their partner.
So far this is the only reason I can think of regarding why do humans cheat. People like Tiger woods... Jack Neo.. they are famous.. they have wife and children. So why do they still cheat? I think it's because they are getting bored of their wife... even though they still love their wife. But is this accurate why do humans cheat? I don't think so... this can't be the only reason.. currently I am still finding out what is the cause.

The simplest example is a child who just bought gameboy advance SP to play. At first when he bought it, he will play with it 24 hours because the game is very interesting. 1 year later, you will find that he is still playing with his gameboy. But no longer 24 hours. It may be just 2 hours per day.
Another 1 year later, you will find that he no longer play his gameboy. So you are curious. You asked him why and he tell you that all of his friends are playing playstation portable(PSP). He is bored of his gameboy games. That's why he don't wanna play them anymore.
However, there are things that we don't get bored of. One good example is gambling. Have you seen a person who gamble said to you that he is tired of gambling? haha... if he said that to you... then something is really wrong. 

The final topic I wanna talk about today is 'bad guys'.
There are so many bad guys in this world.. what type of bad guys am I talking about?
People who rape? People who murder innocent people? People who steal?
Well... I wanna talk about people who commits crime. Basically.... it's the general bad guys.
I am a bad guy... I admit... I committed crime before. I steal before.. I had underage sex before... But I have never ever done anything that causes the death of a person before.
People who know me will never believe that I committed these crimes before... maybe because I always look innocent.. but let me tell you this...  never ever judge a book by its cover.

Think of things that you did wrong before. Think of mistakes that can't be forgiven. Do you dare to confess in front of god? I dare...not because I wanna be a hero... but because I wanna turn back.. I wanna forget about my past.. I wanna forget that I once lost my conscience. But I am sorry... it's just like items... once broken...considered sold. Mistakes that have been done... you will never be able to turn back and wash away your sin. They will follow you like your shadow... no matter how you run.. they will still be able to find you.

The man on the right wearing that gold shirt. He is an actor in Singapore. His nickname is ah nan. In hokkien dialect, we call him ah lam. Inside movies, he always play as the bad guy.. he always play the role of a gangster...loanshark...etc..  Years ago he was arrested by the police in real life for keeping drugs in his house. People start to ponder why did he do that. If there is a choice.. who doesn't wanna be the good guys?

Anyway.. why am I suddenly talking about ah nan? Because he is my uncle.. ya.... he is my relative.

People who know me will know that I WAS a playboy... I used the word 'was' because I believe I am no longer a playboy now. I used to cheat girl's feelings. I know that is wrong... it was bastard to do that.. that's why I turned back before it's too late.
Since everyone is talking about Jack Neo currently, I wanna talk about him too... I understand why did he do that. It was his fault.. I agree... but when he cheated his wife... it wasn't on purpose. To understand why people cheat, you must experience it. people who cheat will never realise that what they are doing is wrong. It's just like a thief. Will a thief who just stolen something confess to the police that he is the thief? The answer is so simple that my 3 years old brother can answer it.

My Richard's law states that 'Your greatest mistake is thinking that you made no mistake'. Why do I say that? well... if you believe that you didn't make any mistake then you won't take action to change the mistake. Am I right to say that?
From our point of view, Jack neo made a mistake ever since he cheated his wife. But to Jack, he himself doesn't know that. He realise that it's a mistake only when his wife found out that he have been cheating on her.

I got to go eat my lunch now.. But before I end this blog post for today, I just wanna say one last thing. Perhaps one of my Richard's law again.
When people make mistake... no matter small or big mistake.. everyone will always remember it. But when people do something right...no matter how right you are... why wasn't there anyone to praise you? Why didn't anyone remember that you are the one who did it right?